Scientists discover new method for arranging matter of fact
Wed Dec 21, 2016 7:38 am
Scientists at Canterbridge University have discovered a new method for arranging matter of facts using atomic manipulation techniques.
Using electron microscopiscy and harnessing quantum fluctuations, researchers were able to arrange matter of facts into thin layers of individual fact atoms or 'factoms', as they are known. This breakthrough research is likely to result in large numbers of excited media types going on about 'factoms' for some time in the future, in all likelihood leading to extensive research grants for Canterbridge University.
The bias of funding on unsubstantiated grounds and the complete lack of practical application for 'factoms' will inevitably lead to the shutdown of useful research in other departments at the university, a situation that was summarised by the Head of Factom Research in a little, joyous jig.
Professor Whoreson and his controversial columnist wife Julie Whoreson will be dining out on this coverage for the next few months.
Share this story: Share this story on Twitter
Latest Imaginary News
Sport > Big money in play at this year's Ballinhole Open
Fri Apr 19, 2024 8:03 am
Politics > Parliament repeals Confused Regional Accents Bill
Fri Apr 19, 2024 8:02 am
World > Remote island wins International Cake-Hardening competition
Thu Apr 18, 2024 7:42 am
Sci & Tech > Wave-particle duality cancels conference appearance
Thu Apr 18, 2024 7:40 am
Business > ITSY dippy on shorts forecast
Thu Apr 18, 2024 7:39 am
Markets >
ISE 100 - down 0.1 at 4107.5
ICU up 0.01% against the Euro
Down 1c against the PD
We occasionally potter about in the garden.
Imaginary News Network
This site is under construction, which means we haven't yet plastered it in ads and stuff like that. In this section we'll probably add a selection of links to more imaginary things, carefully selected based on your unique personality profile.