Imaginary news site pulls really offensive headline
Tue Jan 07, 2025 5:56 am
Imaginary news reporter, Brian Shuttleson, admitted today that he had recently been forced to spike one of his own stories after realising the headline was "really grossly offensive on a number of levels".
"At first I thought I could get away with it", said Shuttleson, sitting at the infamous corner table of The Baker's Legs, "but I read it back again and realised there was no way it was gonna happen. I almost puked".
Temporary Editor of the Imaginary News, Joanna Notherstick, was disappointed but philosophical : "Obviously its a shame for the young lad. We were hoping for big things from this story but in the end we all agreed that he'd made the right decision. And its not the fear of litigation, it was just too damn gross.".
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Recipe Corner
Grilled BBQ Flatburgers
Put 5kg of chopped mince into a large bowl and beat mercilessly for hours. Once the mince has been thoroughly defeated, add to a large vat of acid and skim off any residue. Drain, then shape the mince into patties using the power of your mind. Grill on a hidden BBQ for 4 days each side or until the neighbours complain.
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