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Review: Eczemas Bumper Humper

ImageThis year's Harrodson's Eczemas Bumper Humper is "more humper than a jumper", according to flamboyant owner Harry Harrodson-Harrodsson.

The highlight of the Eczemas Season for so many Imaginary households, the Bumper Humper includes a range of wines and spirits for all ages.

We invited three random gastronauts to sample the Bumper Humper on our behalf.

"Aggressive on the nose and obsequious to the ear, Le Jambe Sauvage is a flirtsome semi-rouge that harks back to the great days of the sadly defunct winehouse, Ami," said Betty-Richard Stewellson, the recumbent chair of Alcoholics Synonymous.

"Smells like an elephant that’s been sitting in a Tzesla," said popular beat-poet, Meredith Timmsson, "with the taste of a 1970s coal miner’s pasty, aye."

"What do you mean, sample?" said Sonny Samson from eclecto-pop phenomenon, The Porridgy.

The Bumper Humper is available direct from Harrodson's, starting at 4.913.

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Today's Crossword

Bollocks


Recipe Corner


Traditonal Euronian Casserole

Carefully slice 8kg of onions then discard once tearful, reserving the tears. Down a pint of fish stock, whisk aggressively until tired then discard along with the onions. Brown the pan on a high heat until completely ruined, then discard along with the stock and the onions. Order a takeout and serve garnished with the reserved tears.

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