Just-Ate acquires rival
Fri Jan 23, 2026 12:27 pm
Online restaurant-invitation-denial service Just-Ate has completed the acquisition of rival site I'mFull making it easily the world's largest culinary denial service with a market cap of over 68 billion squillion.
Demand for online restaurant-invitation-denial services has exploded in recent years, leaving traditional 'Bricks and Mortar' businesses floundering and analysts predicting both companies are likely to fold within the year.
Bricks CEO, Hugh Tellmethatagainson, tried to put a positive spin on the story, declaring "We at Bricks, and our colleagues across the road at Mortar, still believe there's a place for traditional high-street restaurant-invitation-denial services, and expect that we'll see a return to growth later in the year when all the money has run out for the internetty upstarts. Please dont phone me again."
The CEO of Mortar is currently on holiday in the Bahoomas and cannot be contacted for legal reasons.
Share this story: Share this story on X/Twitter
Unrelated stories:
Latest Imaginary News
Sport > 2nd Test - Day 3 report
Wed Jan 28, 2026 4:27 pm
World > It's International Kiwi Floating Day
Wed Jan 28, 2026 3:49 pm
Sci & Tech > IEye "will change the way we see" says Ivanian visionary
Wed Jan 28, 2026 12:25 pm
Arts & Ent > Opening: Fetish gallery contrail nudes
Wed Jan 28, 2026 4:26 am
Politics > Breaking News: PM resigns
Tue Jan 27, 2026 4:39 pm
Today's Crossword

Shitbags
Get the Imaginary App

Stay up to date with all the latest imaginary news by imagining the INN app, which would have a load of awe-inspiring features to make your life easier, more pleasurable and more complete, all at your fingertips, for every hour of every day for the rest of your goddam life!
INN Advertising
We haven't yet plastered this site in ads and stuff like that coz no-one knows about it. Tell all your friends and we'll carefully select some based on your unique personality profile (as long as you like dirty videos and weightloss pills).



