Coach fired after encouraging players to 'fight'
Mon Oct 07, 2024 8:52 am
Coach Leonard Timpson was today removed from his role at the Acton Wasps after being found responsible for an on-field incident that resulted in the death of 19 players.
The match between the Wasps and local rivals the Stenthope Swingers had progressed normally, with the Swingers going in to the halftime break 6 points up. But during the half time prep talk Timpson reportedly told his players to "go out there and fight", and to "take it to the opposition like your life depended on it. Show no mercy!".
Neither team are known for their high levels of intelligence but the bloodbath that followed was still shocking to both spectators. The slaughter was eventually stopped by the arrival of a hotdog van which distracted the remaining Wasps players long enough for them to be rounded up and shot.
Timpson's trial for Incitement to Murder will commence at the County Magistrates Court on the 16th, tickets 4.50, drinks included.
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Traditonal Euronian Casserole
Carefully slice 8kg of onions then discard once tearful, reserving the tears. Down a pint of fish stock, whisk aggressively until tired then discard along with the onions. Brown the pan on a high heat until completely ruined, then discard along with the stock and the onions. Order a takeout and serve garnished with the reserved tears.
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