Product Review: 5 litre Elvis
Wed Jun 10, 2026 1:24 pm
Manufacturers are pinning their hopes on the newly branded 5 litre Elvis. Backed, as it is, by an all-pervasive marketing campaign its unlikely you won't have heard of it, but is it any good? Our Imaginary reviewers are the first to get their hands on it, here's our view:
Like its predecessors, the 5 litre Elvis is compact for its size. Packing a punch, a schnapps and a double G & T, the overall package certainly feels solid in the hand, with just a bit of give around the edges (where, to be frank, its needed).
Visually it is appealing, jumpsuit all up a sparkling aye, with a glint in the eye, few could ask much more in the seeing department. Aurally too, the Elvis range performs up there with the best, with a clear and distinct treble, a hearty, resonant double and a singular urinary tract of unrivalled purity.
The 5 litre Elvis has its flaws ; in a dark room or enclosed space it is jittery, frequently restless, providing more than enough discharge and you're going to feel it within a few hours. It's backplate is also severely under-constructed for a model of this price range - there are many competitors out there with the full titanium strap-spank that is lacking here.
Whether this is the Elvis that will provide the manufacturers that solid base they've been striving for since the lacklustre reception to the 2018 edition is still open for debate, but certainly the 5 litre Elvis is a strong candidate for inclusion in most collectors' grinding cabinets.
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Recipe Corner
Spinach & Ricotta Pasta Wedges
This dish is all about the preparation, so before you start, travel to Italy and live with a local family for 16 years before preparing the pasta. Once you're ready to start, roll the spinach into thin sheets and hang them over a washing line until dry. Move the ricotta craftily (making sure to use a sharp knife) and then layer all the ingredients in a large pan, slightly too big to fit in the oven. Empty the ingredients from the pan onto a floured surface and curse loudly until they are well mixed. Give up and go to the pub.
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