New cinema releases
Fri Oct 23, 2026 12:45 pm
This week, after a long period of acclimatisation and gradual weaning from their surrogate breast-host, six cinemas have been released into the wild in the marshy peatlands just north of Dumplank. All six cinemas were seen gamboling joyfully before disappearing into the dense undergrowth.
The release comes after years of patient care and training by the volunteer group who discovered the cinemas in a disused mineshaft 8 years ago. It is believed the cinemas were left there after being captured by a rogue gang of confused horse bandits who completely lost track of time.
It is hoped the successful release of the cinemas will encourage the eventual release of other rescued buildings, including a multi-storey car-park that has been hand-reared since being found in a discarded bin-bag when it was just a baby.
Share this story: Share this story on X/Twitter
Unrelated stories:
Latest Imaginary News
Sport > Latest scores from the Primary League
Sat Nov 14, 2026 2:44 pm
Business > FairAir offers passengers opportunity to stand with their arms outstretched
Sat Nov 14, 2026 2:40 pm
Arts & Ent > Jackson Jones finds his funk
Fri Nov 13, 2026 2:34 pm
Sci & Tech > Grrravity deflection detected by top scienceman
Fri Nov 13, 2026 2:31 pm
World > Dangerous shrinking craze revealed to be 'No serious threat to society"
Fri Nov 13, 2026 12:15 pm
Today's Crossword
Arsebasket
Infinite Suduko
Join the craze thats sweeping the nation : Draw a series of grids of 3x3 squares stretching to infinity and fill them with the numbers 1 to 9, making sure that each number is used only once in each grid and that all rows and columns add up to infinity.
Send your completed grids to 3, The Washtubs, London for your chance to win a couple of quid
INN Advertising
We haven't yet plastered this site in ads and stuff like that coz no-one knows about it. Tell all your friends and we'll carefully select some based on your unique personality profile (as long as you like dirty videos and weightloss pills).