Novel sex biscuit excites markets
Wed Jul 08, 2026 2:32 pm
The development of a new form of sex biscuit built from widely available raw materials has caused a spike in global market excitement.
Markets first chewed on the biscuit news for a few hours on brisk morning trading, before rising proudly in the afternoon session. By the close markets were at full peak and barely able to sit down unaided.
Sensing an opening in armernican markets has done little to curtail the market's solidity, which most are hoping will wane by the morning when their mother is due to visit.
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Today's Crossword
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Recipe Corner
Poached Herring Balls
Tackle 3 herring from behind and remove the stems. Wash thoroughly in tepid water and marinade for 6 weeks in a dark storeroom. Meanwhile, place the potatoes in a tidy baking dish and cover until risen. (This might take some time so encourage them with supportive comments at least daily). When the potatoes are desicated, add to the herring and bake on the middle shelf of an oven at gas mark 12, until the balls are crispy. Serve with a side salad and a chianti to someone you don't like.
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