Caspar Wine Burger profits boost
Fri Jul 24, 2026 8:12 pm
Fast food chain Caspar has announced a 44% increase in 2nd quarter profits after a successful launch of its new 'Wine Burger' range.
The new range of alcoholic burgers has been condemned by health-campaigners, who were invited to Caspar's recent AGM and shot. Since then, the new products have helped increase turnover at the chain's restaurants by 67%, but with a corresponding 28% costs increase through having to employ more cleaners.
Shares in Caspar, which have been dead since 2006, have done the full Ronald and are likely to funellate themselves slowly in the 3rd quarter.
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Recipe Corner
Poached Herring Balls
Tackle 3 herring from behind and remove the stems. Wash thoroughly in tepid water and marinade for 6 weeks in a dark storeroom. Meanwhile, place the potatoes in a tidy baking dish and cover until risen. (This might take some time so encourage them with supportive comments at least daily). When the potatoes are desicated, add to the herring and bake on the middle shelf of an oven at gas mark 12, until the balls are crispy. Serve with a side salad and a chianti to someone you don't like.
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